I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
