Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
