It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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