porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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