Non-Jews are for practice
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
