You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
