So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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