the new term for farting is butt boxing.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
