sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
