I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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