I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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