never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize