i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You can't motorboat a personality
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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