Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
