reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
