Who wears a wallet chain?!
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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