youre lurking in front of me
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We just shotgunned beers for America
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
