it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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