I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
