one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
