so that wasnt chicken after all
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
