all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
she pinky promised me she was 18
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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