I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
