Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
