It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
