white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
