So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
