yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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