When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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