I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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