how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
