Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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