we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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