You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize