I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
