so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
