i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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