wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
