I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
