come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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