The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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