She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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