You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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