Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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