fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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