Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
