I'm going to jail i love you
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
