did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
