Life is so much better after having sex.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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