AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
