in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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